Thursday, July 9, 2009

...and the dilemma continues

What's more important in life...Money or Emotions? I know, the mind says, in a flash, "Ha! Money", and the heart says, even faster..."emotions, of course!" But, seriously, if you really have to chose one amongst the two, which one will you chose? Which one should you chose?

Let's look at the pros and cons. If you go by the mind and let your heart go silent for a while, then you leave the things that you find most exciting right now, at this age. You go ahead and do well, if not excellent, in your career. You have many of the things already ensured for you and you can go ahead and worry for the higher things in life. You have a beautiful house, and aim for a better one. You have a car gifted to you by your parents in your marriage, that is, just when you begin your life, per say. You have a husband whom you don't really know right now, but will learn to love in a little time. And, there will be the career, kids, responsiblities, functions, and whole lot of things to do, which will give you hardly any time to think. Then, you will not even remember that there was a time when you thought that life could be different.

But, whenever there is a moment in your life when you are sad, or unhappy with your life, when you had a fight with your husband, or when you miss a friend in your partner, there will be a passing thought in your mind, "Could my life have been different than this, and maybe better?" You think that the kind of issues that you have with your husband right now, would they have been there if you had followed your heart! When you have issues with your job, you think that despite all the luxuries of life I am not doing what I really wanted to do. Am I really in the right job? Is it really what I was meant for? At the end of your life, when you re-iterate what yoy got and what you lost, you realise it is not how much you earned materialistically, but what you earned personally, as a human being.

Now, let's look at the other side of the coin. If you go by your heart, you have everything that your heart wanted. A person as you life partner whom you chose, the freedom to chose a career that you thought was right for you. Basically, all in all, you life is all about your decisions and you have no one to blame, if anything goes wrong. But, what if something does go wrong in the pretty, beautiful picture that you made? What if the person you so relied on is not actually "the one"? What if the career chosen is just another one in the list and at the end of the day, a job is a job, and it can never become a hobby. You cannot have everything good in your life. What if you have a hubby who is perfect but now, you live in such a state that you don't feel like facing your friends or relatives, coz they are much better placed. At the end of the day, you cannot fill your tummy with love and loved ones. You need things which make you feel successful worldly wise!

So, what is it actually that one can do?

I think, in every scenario it's "greed" that has set in. One can be a good human being and go by the heart after marrying someone chosen by your parents. Your life doesn't stop at the point of chosing a partner. It's not the end of life for you if you get a partner who's not perfect for you. You can make your life good and do the things in your life which you really want to do. Your job may not be your hobby but you can try and make sure that your life has your hobbies as well as the job. They need not be the same.

But the dilemma goes much beyond this..... The situation isn't as simple as it seems. The problem doesn't end there. While following your heart and keeping your mind in synch, there are societal pressures and family bonding that come in. There are times when you've conflicts with your family over the decisions you're making. You want to follow it and take the risk involved. Your parents cannot understand the reason behind it and want you to remain safe. What do you do? Of course, you cannot guarantee that nothing will go wrong. It's a risk, after all. How far should you go? Is it possible to make traditions understand the reasons of heart? Are the reasons of heart really worth hearing to?

The dilemma continues.

4 comments:

Day Dreamer said...

I don't have anything to say on the before thoughts of a decision but I feel when one has taken some decision either willingly or unwillingly ,he can always mold his ways and thoughts to make that decision a success , that task as his hobby , that person as "the one"... In life you can never have everything that you want, but you can always make what you have as the thing you want....

Hope said...

I don't know how you do it.... I am surprised to hear that someone takes it this way too! I truly am. I mean, it's like "Shoot and wherever you hit, take it as target" for me. But, I know it's a wrong way to look at the situation. I understand what you're trying to say but I don't get that feeling, somehow, in myself.

Maverick said...

hmmmm.....i am a guy....cant say what i ld have followed, had i been a girl....but i can say...i am not doing my dream job...cause dreams tend to be unrealistic...

Maverick said...

but ya...few years down the line...i think MONEY becomes priority